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Friday, June 8, 2012

The Whiplash of the Past Week

I just got done with the annual weekend of Utter Craziness at my job. I do not wish that shit on anyone - though honestly it was a lot less pressure this year than most. The registration apparatus finally joined the 21st century and went online- which meant for the most part no one registering day of. Everyone was just picking up their items day of. I had to sit in the "problem room" which is alternately fun and no- fun. It's fun when no one comes in and it's just you and your wifi connection (which is for stretches of about ten to twenty minutes at a time). And I finally got on the HBOGO bandwagon (quietly TimeWarner must have decided to jump their asses on board and now we, TimeWarner HBO subscribers can have it too- they should be ashamed that we were some of the last cable subscribers to get it). But then sitting in the "problem room" is no fun because when people do come in it's because they have real problems. Of course it's usually their fault and so we have to be the ones to take the hard line and tell them no. (FYI - in general my office's unstated policy when dealing with its constituency is basically that we never say "no" to people- but since this is a legal thing having to so with alcohol -we have to draw the line). So that's fun- I'm being sarcastic- having to tell these spoiled, frequently rich and over privileged people, that the answer is "no". You can imagine how that goes over. Last year I actually had this weirdo harass me for a good hour until I had to call the cops. Niiice.

Anyhoo, after the general clusterfuck that that is (although as I said not so fuck-y this year- I know in part because I gave less of a shit than in years past), I hopped on that plane to Tampa Sunday afternoon. The pilot (a black man! I could tell just from his voice) had the "fasten your seatbelt" light on the entire flight. Yes there was turbulence but honestly- it never ended up being horrible. In fact the flight back was worse. Whatever. So the friend I went to visit Lovey*, had a major health-scare recently but is good (and in CT this weekend- by the way). I felt like a mama bear the whole time because I was so worried about her. She's all better to look at her but she's on a shitload of medication, some of which give her bruises all over her body. She is behaving like there's nothing wrong, and in a kind of a way that's good. She's living her life and everything but I worry that no one is looking out for her. She has a group that she runs with- they're all twenty-somethings (except for this white boy who's pants she's trying to get into). But I think with the exception of this one black girl, they aren't remembering that she's not at 100%. The black girl reassured me though. Swore that she was looking out and making sure Lovey didn't over do it. But what does that mean?

'Cuz for example here's Lovey's list of things she was planning to do if I hadn't told her she's lost her GD mind: Krav Maga, rollerblading, Ladies Night at the gun range, boxing and paintball. I managed to remind her that Krav Maga, paintball and rollerblading were an immensely bad idea for someone who has few blood-clotting factors and as a result bruises easily. The other ones she's definitely going to attempt. I tried not to Mommy her too much but honestly since I don't want my good friend to drop dead, I don't know how successful I was. (She claimed I wasn't that bad, but our mutual friend who'd visited a couple weeks earlier was better). I'd prefer to proverbially nag her to death than have her actually die.

Anyway, her apartment was nice, central air, small terrace, washer/dryer. She had art and posters she'd inheirited from her mom and dad all over the walls. And hand-me-down furniture from friends. But it was all really cute. Something you'd have paid at least thirteen hundred dollars for in the city (at least). She was paying, I think seven-something. It reminded me that as much as it breaks my heart I really have to start thinking about getting the hell of New York at some point. Overall, I was jealous- she doesn't actually realize it but it's a real grown-up's apartment. But you have to drive absolutely everywhere in Tampa- which sucks. And Tampa itself is completely uninteresting. It reminds me of Houston in that it's flat, blazing hot and a sea of concrete. It's totally unimpressive, which was disappointing. We went to St. Petersburg too- that was better. It reminded me of the nice parts of Ft. Lauderdale, where we drove around and there were shops and places to walk. I liked that. I don't think I would have wanted to live there but at least it's a spot I wouldn't mind visiting and it's directly on the water. Lovey likes it there too but it's a 20-40 minute drive from Tampa and her school. It's just a better idea for her to be within walking distance of school. She's driving her Dad's old Pontiac that gives her trouble occasionally and her doctor told her she shouldn't ride her bike anymore. So she needs to be close. Her lease is about to be up so she's thinking of moving even closer than she already is and into a two bedroom (only in places outside of NYC are those type of dreams even possible for a single girl making what we make- and technically I make more than her, oh the irony). So that was that. I want to go down again sometime relatively soon. I don't know why but I feel really protective of her right now.

Yesterday at work was busy but uneventful. In a real way I'm very happy about having applied for the other job (who haven't gotten back to me btw so I think that's a done deal) but in another way I feel really stupid. Because considering alternate employment has sort of made me resentful. I've been dissatisfied at work for a long time but I'm even more so now. It's like applying somewhere else woke me up. It's not good. The prospect of getting away from here has made everything and everyone get on my nerves just a little bit more than they might have normally. Truth told, I think that's why The Event didn't seem as horrible this year. I think I was thinking "This is my last year- so just let it go." I was resigned to the bullshit. This is a bad place to be mentally. I'm not saying I haven't been phoning it in for a while now but I'm really phoning it in now. I have to get back to the reality that this is my job. Or I'm gonna end up getting fired or some shit.

Well, enough of that. I wore a dress today in honor of having just seen Streetcar Named Desire with the incomparable Nicole Ari Parker and Blair Underwood. And of course Aunt Flo has decided to visit finally- she'd been announcing her imminent arrival since last week Tuesday. I don't know if this is always the case but my breasts are enormous this month. They're practically blocking my view of my feet! WTF! None of my bras fit. And then on top of it, because I've been binge eating, I've gained five pounds already. It's a tragedy- a travesty. I feel like a real girl this month (I don't menstruate often so it tends to be a novelty). It's weird.

*Her name's not Lovey