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Thursday, February 17, 2011

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Soldier of Love, or not.

My V-day was probably the worst one in a few years. But that’s not saying much. Usually, I just watch Valentine’s go down with a very mild wistfulness and some good humor. That worked for most of yesterday, but then in the evening I got a little sad when I saw all the flower and Valentine vendors. Usually I brush it off but yesterday I (very) briefly got caught up. I generally try to be very pragmatic about it all. Last night (I didn’t cry or anything pathetic like that) but I felt like I was missing out. I realized I’ve never had a valentine (really never) and it made me sad. I got over it but it sucked in the meantime.

Well, I know you’re more than over me talking about this and so I have to ask for some indulgence from you. Really I don’t know what or why I’m telling you this because it’s not a big deal, but I feel compelled. Every time I think about the fact that Claire and her husband have been married eight years, it just blows my mind. I mean they weren’t high school sweethearts or anything. Claire had a full and active (adult) dating life before she even met him. How can that be the case? How have they have been together so long already?!?!? WE’RE OLD! Yesterday, I was telling The Guy about my peppermint patty hot chocolate and how I complained about the liquor content of it and how my dear, dear friends all laughed at me. He said “Oh that’s just like my wife. When we were in college, we’d be at parties and after she had one drink I’d find her curled up somewhere sleeping.” So he's been with his wife for ten years at least (based on his age) but probably more like twelve. I just don't understand! When did we get so old? And how did I let my whole single-gal situation get so bad? Whatever.

I'm coming to the conclusion that all the good guys worth having have already been scooped up by girls with the more savvy priorities in college. Namely, to "spend at least as much time worrying about who you're gonna marry as what your GPA is". Since I didn't do much of either I'm really up Sh*t's Creek. I watched Practical Magic the other day for the first time in years and Sandra Bullock's character said she was dreaming of a love even time would stand still for. I still almost choke on the schmaltzy-ness of that. Corny isn't even the word... but I kinda get it now. Ten years after I saw that movie first, I sit alone on Valentine's Day wondering where the time went.

Sade, take me out of here...

Monday, February 14, 2011

Imponderables: Just in time for Valentine's!

QUESTION: When a man in a song refers to a "Soul Sister" isn't that by definition a black woman? Or is that only a "Soul Sistah"? If he is white and he talks about "brown skin", is he automatically talking about a tanned white woman? Or is he actually talking about a black woman?

Apropos of nothing, I was listening to Soul Sister by Train on Pandora and I went to the lyrics page (because that song both bugs me and I like it). I was irritating my friend while in FL last September with it. They had been killing it on the radio and I started to sing along all the while railing against the fact that they were calling who I presumed was a white girl "Soul Sister". I mean I like the song but that just drives me to distraction. I can’t make heads or tails of it. So I decided to look at their Pandora message board and someone said (between the complaints of it being overplayed on the radio –which of course I agree with), "I think they like the chocolate milk". (I’ve never heard us referred to as chocolate milk but okay...go with it). So in that moment, I decided- between the name and the reference in the middle to “the way you can cut a rug… so gangsta, I’m so thug”, that they were actually writing that song to a black girl (possibly unrequited) and their label made them put the blonde girl in the video. I have made the executive decision that that’s my interpretation. ‘Cuz it was driving me freekin’ insane.

Similarly, many moons ago I ignored an obvious reference to "brown skin" in Don Henley's Boys of Summer because despite that lyric, the video very clearly showed a blonde white girl frolicking in the surf. Mystery solved, right? But I have discovered this again recently in the song Still by Matt Nathanson (of whom I am a fan). He was singing that he could still see her "brown skin shine" and this time it was in a hotel room, not on a beach. Now, I'm sorry but very few tanned white women have brown skin, let alone "shining" brown skin in fluorescent lighting! What is this about, Nobody? C'mon Matt, is this an ode to interracial love gone wrong or are you confused about the melanin content of your average anglo-saxon female?

Ahh...Valentine's Day. A day better spent being overly analytical, bordering on curmudgeonly than a sad sack.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

TV Funhouse II

Now's as good a time as any to admit I have a very co-dependent relationship with my DVR. I don't know what I did before he came into my life and I have no idea what I would do if he wasn't around anymore. In order to honor that relationship, I've anthropomorphized it- him- and his name is Josh. So now you know...

So, Josh didn’t record Parenthood or something. I mean last Tuesday I thought I remembered him listing it at 10 as recording but then when I started going through my queue, it wasn’t there! So I don’t know if I accidentally deleted it (although I think I’d remember that) or discovered a timing conflict and didn’t record it. It's happened before. They’ve been shuffling the schedule and I think it’s creating conflicts all over. Just Thursday night I had the ill-crazy conflict, because 30Rock, Mentalist and PP come on at the same time now. I had to get rid of 30Rock (I’ll watch it on Hulu). But I can see this is gonna become a problem. I can’t add any new things (like Being Human) because I don’t know when the conflicts are gonna crop up with all this movement.

Anyhoo, Josh recorded The Good Wife just fine- which was good as usual. Not as good as some recent past episodes, but a tasty morsel. I’m shocked Peter actually threw in the towel. Despite what his PAC was doing I didn’t think he and Eli would stop them. Speaking of Eli, I love when he goes to deal with that girl Becca. She’s just like evil personified. I don’t understand why the son didn’t just admit that Becca wasn’t his girlfriend, the other girl was. I’m glad Eli kept an eye on her though- does she just like trouble or is she actually in Glenn Child’s pocket? Anyway, the handwringing about the drug dealer irritated me. They’re defense attorneys making big money, not little public defenders. They don’t get into where the money comes from- that’s a poor person’s game (getting on your little moral high-horse and riding into the sunset- broke). Again, Cary is my man- he can just be awful but it’s awful-awesome! He played himself a little – I guess to impress his co-counsel. Complaining about their lack of resources- only to find himself banned from seeing Kalinda (I think that proclamation in the end is gonna end up making him lose his job). Anyway, Michael J. Fox is back this week, I’m excited. Maybe he can take Alicia to school again.

Private Practice was kinda disappointing to me. I thought that Sam was gonna find Addison was backsliding, since Cristian was being type-obvious. I thought the most telling moment was when Addison said “Sam’s your friend?!” and he said “So?” That was crazy to me. I mean she should have shut him down like a bank on Sunday but still that he didn’t even care (I actually hadn’t realized they were friends). The other thing was did you check out Naomi’s expressions? She looked like Shonda was about to do that old b.s. again about her still carrying a torch for Sam. I will say Audra McDonald was giving all sorts of signals to my eyes. When Addison said Archer wasn’t coming (I love the “I wasn’t at the first wedding so I won’t be at the second wedding” quip) Naomi looked disappointed or something. I was wondering Grant Show is on Big Love this season, so I doubt he’s doing any PP (although I don’t see why not), so what was the face all about? Then when she was arguing with Addison she looked really injured and not in that “Addison, don’t be a butthead” way. In the "Don't break my man's heart" way. Then when she was talking to Sam she had that wistful look-

I was saying to myself "get her character a man stat!" I’d say Sheldon because they have the best temperaments for a couple (and they’re already basically the momma and daddy of the office), but honestly I want someone more dashing for Audra. Though I love Sheldon- Brian Benben forever! (a fan since Dream On)- and I still wouldn’t mind them bringing Fife back. Anybody but Sam. Okay Shonda? Been there, done that, let's skip the return outing.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Commercial XLV

This is the Superbowl XLV Volkswagen commercial. I posted it on my facebook page because it’s the most adorable thing ever! Seriously I love it. And I keep wondering if it was a real kid (looks like it) or was it a short adult ‘cuz the non-verbal acting is so great! Anyway, enjoy it. Having now seen all of them, this really is the best one.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011


And, drum roll please… he’s married! Of course he f@#$ing is! How could I have possibly believed, even for a second otherwise?! Good question. Because no sensible girl worth her salt (with two pieces of a brain in her head) would have let his ass get away. But I guessed that before didn’t I?

I know that you’re thinking I’m making a big deal out of nothing. And I admit that this is a tempest in a teapot. People are starving, children are dying, there's genocide and Global Warming- I don’t have the right to be upset over nothing but I’m soooooo disappointed. I mean I may need to come up with a new word because "disappointment" doesn't adequately describe the feeling.